Characters

Host · Inventor · Bad idea accelerator

• Has the four-room apartment that becomes the group’s accidental refuge.
• Created K1 through K9; an old joke in K9’s code made the ninth unit the “Champion of the AI Quickening.”
• Builds things involving DNA, shrink rays, scanners, and consequences that usually reach kaiju scale.

Room two · Gas-station survivor · K9’s Master

• Moves into Joe’s second room after a spectacularly bad breakup.
• Works at Greedy Gary’s Gas, where workplace safety includes an infernal robber-disposal mechanism.
• Acts as K9’s day-to-day authority and the household’s most persistent source of rules.

Room three · Certified biscuit maker · Realist

• Arrives after his roommate skips town with the rent and his job cuts his hours.
• Works at Kiss My Grits as a certified biscuit maker and deeply resents its powdered “redneck sauce.”
• Often supplies the dry correction immediately before reality becomes even less reasonable.

Room four · Zombie preparedness · Fructose-powered

• Moves into room four after “two zombie broads” appear in his house.
• Works at a restaurant under Brian and maintains unusually relevant anti-zombie precautions.
• Has catastrophic sugar episodes and borrows K9’s holographic workstation to make webcomics.